An Atheist in the Woods

An atheist was walking through the woods.

"What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a seven - foot grizzly bear charging toward him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw the bear closing on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with its left paw and raising its right paw to strike him.

At that instant, the atheist cried out: "Oh, my God!"

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky:

"YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THOSE YEARS, TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON'T EXIST, AND EVEN CREDIT THE CREATION TO A COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU OUT OF THIS PREDICAMENT? AM I TO COUNT YOU AS A NEW BELIEVER?"

The atheist looked into the light. "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian, now, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?"

"VERY WELL," said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. The bear dropped its right paw, brought both paws together, bowed its head, and spoke:

"Father, bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."