Wednesday, March 29, 2006

A Worm in Human Guise

Despite pleas from the Vatican, U.S. lawmakers and the president, Michael Schiavo says he could not have divorced his brain-damaged wife and given up the fight to let her die.

In January, Michael Schiavo married Jodi Centonze, whom he had called his fiancee for more than five years. The couple met in a dentist's office and began a relationship after Terri Schiavo was already in a nursing home. They have two young children.

I'm touched. Really, I am. Oh, what a boundless, transcendent love. How can I ever hope to reach such pinnacles of virtue? Divorce Was Not An Option. But an illicit affair and the fathering of two children outside wedlock was superfunkycool.

How far we've sunk as a society, somewhere beneath the muck and ooze at the bottom of the Marianas Trench. "Till Death Do Us Part" now translates to "Until I Kill You, My Darling."

As for Michael Schiavo, when he shovels it, he uses a snow-scoop.

No comments: