You're A Redneck If. . .

Someone sent me this in an email:


1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.

3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.

5. You think the "nutcracker" is something you do off the high dive.

6. The salvation army declines your furniture.

7. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

8. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

9. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

10. Your grandmother has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

11. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.

12. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

13. You have a rag for a gas cap.

14. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

15. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

16. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000 worth of improvements.

17. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.

18. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65.