Amnesty National

Remember all the bilge about a "Temporary Guest-Worker Program" Bush and others have been spewing? Well, not to worry. The new Senate legislation ensures their transmogrification into Permanent Job Takers. Following are a jumble of thoughts on the subject:

1. I think it's asinine that we're even discussing "guest-workers," since the welfare system is overloaded, hospitals are foundering, the border has more holes in it than Darwinism, and the geographical areas with the highest concentrations of illegal aliens have proportionate crime spikes.

2. When President Bush and those of like mind say: "We need these people because they fill a void; they do jobs Americans won't do," or similar tripe, this doesn't even dip its toe into addressing the reality of the situation. On one side of the coin, we have certain employers--both big businesses and small--that seek out illegal aliens for hire, while making little or no efforts toward employing citizens. We're not speaking of people who are clueless about legal status; we're talking about conscious efforts to this end.

The flip-side is that, like any well-crafted lie, there is a kernel of truth in Bush's words when he natters on about "jobs Americans won't do." True, citizens are not showing up in droves to vie for jobs that provide high physical stress and low wages; but as usual, the president and his supporters ignore the crux of the matter and opt for circular logic. That these jobs pay so little is due to the rampant process of hiring illegal aliens, which keeps wages in industries such as construction, agriculture and restaurants artificially low. So this very practice causes the problem it theoretically is designed to fix--first it creates the gaping hole in the job market, then uses this rift in justifying the perpetual importation of Rio Grande triathletes. I've never heard Bush acknowledge any of the above in a single speech or policy statement.

3. The president insists his immigration plan is not an amnesty, and this is true, so long as one adheres to the fictional definition of the word existing wholly in his mind and nowhere outside its confines.

Dictionary.com defines amnesty thusly:

A. A general pardon granted by a government, especially for political offenses. B. an act of clemency by an authority (as a government) by which pardon is granted esp. to a group of individuals. C. a period during which offenders are exempt from punishment. D. a warrant granting release from punishment for an offense.

So the word goes beyond forgiveness for wrongdoing; it entails the foregoing of just and deserved punishment, as well. Judging by the president's words, amnesty means full and expedited conferral of citizenship. Anything less is not amnesty. In Southron intellectual circles, this is known as Pure B.S.

The facts speak for themselves. Our current laws on the books call for deportation of those who sneak into our country outside legal channels. Not one syllable of new legislation is needed in bringing this about. When our president and Congress tell these invaders, in essence, that the laws are for suckers and that illegals need not worry about deportation, that is amnesty. Period. Calling a frog a prince doesn't make it anything more or less than a frog. Can I get an amen, Kermit?