Great news, everyone! Hamas has just divulged its new peace initiative for Israel! Whew, I'm glad the "cycle of violence" finally is at an end. Their plans seem reasonable and not at all unfair. Here's the blueprint:
1. Lynch Ariel Sharon's comatose body from the Wailing Wall.
2. Excise the Zionist Entity from all maps and atlases, replacing it with the designation "Palestine" from the Mediterranean to the east of the Jordan River.
3. Continue excoriating the Jews for using Gentile blood in matzos.
4. Continue denying the Holocaust ever took place.
5. Continue homicide bombings of military installations such as discotheques, pizza parlors, public transit buses, movie theaters and private weddings.
6. Utilize Gaza as a terrorist training camp and a launching ground for further assaults on the Zionist Entity.
7. Meet the ultimate goal of driving every Jewish man, woman, and child into the sea. Or kill them all. Preferably the latter.
8. Burn every synagogue in the region, replacing each with "Religion of Peace" mosques.
9. Nominate Osama bin Laden as the new prime minister of Palestine.
10. Change the official name of Jerusalem to Al-Quds.
If only these ten criteria are met, surely we shall see peace in the Middle East, at long last.
No comments:
Post a Comment