Monday, October 31, 2005
Saturday, October 29, 2005
To Kill, or Not to Kill
I've always been a diehard pro-capital punishment kind of guy--at least, until recently. It seems as I grow older, I become more torn between what I know is morally acceptable, and what actually works in the real world. Let me explain:
I consider the death penalty a biblical institution and wholly just when applied in the correct manner. Not for the sake of vengeance or deterrence do I hold this view, but rather because it was ordained by God. If man is made in the image of God, murder is one of the ugliest sins imaginable. True justice cannot be served, unless the murderer's life is forfeit. Society must send this message to evil-doers, loud and clear. Any deterrent effect is just an added bonus.
So in short, I have no moral qualms about the death penalty as an institution. Nor will I lose sleep when a child molester or killer is executed.
But then I turn and see the utter decomposition of our judicial (none dare call it "justice" with a straight face) system. Time and time again, I read about the horrors of pervasive, systemic corruption in our courts, both in small matters, and those of great import. I drew the conclusion quite some time ago that the system as it functions, currently, is just a money-making racket and a complete sham.
So the questions arise: Do we place the power of life and death in dirty hands? Do we continue investing such control in people who have proven disinterested in--or downright hostile to--the notion of justice? Is making an impartial and factual determination of guilt or innocence within the scope of our courts' abilities, as they stand? If not, how do we resolve this painful dilemma?
I consider failure in executing a murderer a breach of justice; but an even greater injustice, in my opinion, is putting to death a person who is blameless.
The only solution I see, for the nonce, is limiting capital punishment's use to cases in which the perpetrator's guilt is not in question. For example, he is caught in the act by the authorities, or several parties can attest to having witnessed his barbarities, or the criminal demonstrably confesses his crime without compulsion. Another option is a complete overhaul and slash-and-burn policy within our judicial system, with built-in accountability. Unfortunately, I don't see that happening, any time soon.
I realize these scenarios aren't foolproof, and as I said, I'm torn. My opinion isn't set in stone, on this matter.
I welcome your comments.
I consider the death penalty a biblical institution and wholly just when applied in the correct manner. Not for the sake of vengeance or deterrence do I hold this view, but rather because it was ordained by God. If man is made in the image of God, murder is one of the ugliest sins imaginable. True justice cannot be served, unless the murderer's life is forfeit. Society must send this message to evil-doers, loud and clear. Any deterrent effect is just an added bonus.
So in short, I have no moral qualms about the death penalty as an institution. Nor will I lose sleep when a child molester or killer is executed.
But then I turn and see the utter decomposition of our judicial (none dare call it "justice" with a straight face) system. Time and time again, I read about the horrors of pervasive, systemic corruption in our courts, both in small matters, and those of great import. I drew the conclusion quite some time ago that the system as it functions, currently, is just a money-making racket and a complete sham.
So the questions arise: Do we place the power of life and death in dirty hands? Do we continue investing such control in people who have proven disinterested in--or downright hostile to--the notion of justice? Is making an impartial and factual determination of guilt or innocence within the scope of our courts' abilities, as they stand? If not, how do we resolve this painful dilemma?
I consider failure in executing a murderer a breach of justice; but an even greater injustice, in my opinion, is putting to death a person who is blameless.
The only solution I see, for the nonce, is limiting capital punishment's use to cases in which the perpetrator's guilt is not in question. For example, he is caught in the act by the authorities, or several parties can attest to having witnessed his barbarities, or the criminal demonstrably confesses his crime without compulsion. Another option is a complete overhaul and slash-and-burn policy within our judicial system, with built-in accountability. Unfortunately, I don't see that happening, any time soon.
I realize these scenarios aren't foolproof, and as I said, I'm torn. My opinion isn't set in stone, on this matter.
I welcome your comments.
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Sick of Skewel
My mother sent this to me in an email. Supposedly, these are actual parental explanations for their childrens' absence from skewel.
NO PARENTS LEFT BEHIND
(Spellings have been left intact.)
NO PARENTS LEFT BEHIND
(Spellings have been left intact.)
1-- MY SON IS UNDER A DOCTOR'S CARE AND SHOULD NOT TAKE PE TODAY. PLEASE EXECUTE HIM.
2-- PLEASE EXKUCE LISA FOR BEING ABSENT SHE WAS SICK AND I HAD HER SHOT.
3-- DEAR SCHOOL: PLEASE ECSC's JOHN BEING ABSENT ON JAN. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 AND ALSO 33.
4-- PLEASE EXCUSE GLORIA FROM JIM TODAY. SHE IS ADMINISTRATING.
5-- PLEASE EXCUSE ROLAND FROM P.E. FOR A FEW DAYS. YESTERDAY HE
FELL OUT OF A TREE AND MISPLACED HIS HIP.
6-- JOHN HAS BEEN ABSENT BECAUSE HE HAD TWO TEETH TAKEN OUT OF HIS FACE.
7-- CARLOS WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE WAS PLAYING FOOTBALL. HE WAS HURT IN THE GROWING PART.
8-- MEGAN COULD NOT COME TO SCHOOL TODAY BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN
BOTHERED BY VERY CLOSE VEINS.
9-- CHRIS WILL NOT BE IN SCHOOL CUS HE HAS AN ACRE IN HIS SIDE.
10-- PLEASE EXCUSE RAY FRIDAY FROM SCHOOL. HE HAS VERY
LOOSE VOWELS.
11-- PLEASE EXCUSE PEDRO FROM BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD
(DIAHRE, DYREA, DIREATHE), THE SH**S. NOTE: [WORDS IN ( *)'s WERE CROSSED OUT].
12-- PLEASE EXCUSE TOMMY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD DIARRHEA, AND HIS BOOTS LEAK.
13-- IRVING WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE MISSED HIS BUST.
14-- PLEASE EXCUSE JIMMY FOR BEING. IT WAS HIS FATHER'S FAULT.
15 -- I KEPT BILLIE HOME BECAUSE SHE HAD TO GO CHRISTMAS SHOPPING BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT SIZE SHE WEAR.
16-- PLEASE EXCUSE JENNIFER FOR MISSING SCHOOL YESTERDAY. WE FORGOT TO GET THE SUNDAY PAPER OFF THE PORCH, AND WHEN WE FOUND IT MONDAY. WE THOUGHT IT WAS SUNDAY.
17-- SALLY WON'T BE IN SCHOOL A WEEK FROM FRIDAY. WE HAVE TO ATTEND HER FUNERAL.
18-- MY DAUGHTER WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE SHE WAS TIRED. SHE SPENT A WEEKEND WITH THE MARINES.
19-- PLEASE EXCUSE JASON FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD A COLD AND COULD NOT BREED WELL.
20-- PLEASE EXCUSE MARY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. SHE WAS IN BED WITH GRAMPS.
21-- GLORIA WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY AS SHE WAS HAVING A GANGOVER.
22-- PLEASE EXCUSE BRENDA. SHE HAS BEEN SICK AND UNDER THE DOCTOR.
23-- MARYANN WAS ABSENT DECEMBER 11-16, BECAUSE SHE HAD A FEVER, SORE THROAT, HEADACHE AND UPSET STOMACH. HER SISTER WAS ALSO SICK, FEVER AN SORE THROAT, HER BROTHER HAD A LOW GRADE FEVER AND ACHED ALL OVER. I WASN'T THE BEST EITHER, SORE THROAT AND FEVER. THERE MUST BE SOMETHING GOING AROUND, HER FATHER EVEN GOT HOT LAST NIGHT.
You might want to skip the public schools, if you truly want your chillun to get a real education. On the other hand, if you want them to grow up to be semi-literate drones, clearly the public schools are accomplishing this with flying colors.
PSA
I WANT YOU!!!!!. . .. . .for the new Iraqi woodchipper team.
Benefits include: hearing the melodic screams of the dying, experience in the art of torture, general wallowing in human misery and gore, and a robust medical/dental plan.
Contact your local recruiting office for more details.
Monday, October 24, 2005
Of Paradoxes and Polecats
Bane wrote an interesting and thought-provoking meme, over at his blog, and challenged his readers to answer the proffered questions. What is a meme, you may ask? I have no idea, I may answer. But he wrote one, and I'm responding to it.
If you could have one person on the planet killed, right now, with no consequence to yourself, who would you choose, and why?
Osama bin Laden, because it would be justice served, and few alive deserve it more.
If you could have wild, wanton sex with the person of your choice, them your willing slave, for an entire weekend, at the place of your choosing, who would it be, why, and where?
Wayul, whut kinda question is that? I reckon I'll answer: My wife, because I love her and am committed to her, and probably in some mountain retreat, beside a nice, roaring fire, with Osama's head mounted just above the mantle. How's that for romantic?
In the entire known history of mankind, if you could go back and put a bullet into their head, with no consequence to yourself, or your lineage, who would it be? Why? If no one, why?
This one's a toss-up, for me: Either Charles Darwin--for popularizing the theory of evolution; Muhammed, for being a murderous, mangy sand-flea; or the guy who invented the DVD player. You wouldn't believe what it's cost me to make the transition from VHS tapes to discs.
If there was one mammalian species you had to choose, right now, to become extinct, which would it be?
Another toss-up: Either the leftist moonbat, or the polecat (that's Southron for skunk).
Assuming God exists, and he handed you a button that, if pushed, would destroy Him, Jesus, the Kingdom of Heaven, and the entire Heavenly Host, would you push it, and why? Or why not?
And extinguish the only light in this dark universe? Are you kidding?
Assuming the universe still exists after that last question, if God handed you a button that, if pushed, would erase humanity from existence, would you push it, and why? Or why not?
If I really had this option, I might give it a few moments of sincere pondering. Aren't y'all delighted that I'm not God? I wouldn't do it because--for all their faults and evils--there are many good people who spread love and hope throughout the world. And for some reason, God chooses not to do just that. Who am I to question His wisdom? Now, if you limited this to certain sections of the population, I might consider it further. Again, aren't y'all thrilled that I'm not the Creator?
Assuming humanity still exists, after that last question, if God handed you a button that would erase one race from existence, would you push it, who would you choose, and why?
Get behind me, Satan! You sorely tempt me. The Arab race has vexed the last 1,400 years of history, so I'd likely go with them, if I pushed the button. But I don't see the world through racial lenses, and even the Arabs deserve the chance to seek Christ's redemption. No human being should have such arbitrary power.
Aside from all the other questions, and apart (and I wish you would consider each one of them separately) if you could go back in your own timeline, anywhere, and change any one event, knowing that your present would utterly disappear, altered forever......would you? And, if yes, which one.
Nope. There's too much about my present life that I love, too many people who have entered it, only to brighten the drab curtains and splash rainbow colors on the walls. No change in my past is worth the loss of even one of these cherished ones.
If you could have one person on the planet killed, right now, with no consequence to yourself, who would you choose, and why?
Osama bin Laden, because it would be justice served, and few alive deserve it more.
If you could have wild, wanton sex with the person of your choice, them your willing slave, for an entire weekend, at the place of your choosing, who would it be, why, and where?
Wayul, whut kinda question is that? I reckon I'll answer: My wife, because I love her and am committed to her, and probably in some mountain retreat, beside a nice, roaring fire, with Osama's head mounted just above the mantle. How's that for romantic?
In the entire known history of mankind, if you could go back and put a bullet into their head, with no consequence to yourself, or your lineage, who would it be? Why? If no one, why?
This one's a toss-up, for me: Either Charles Darwin--for popularizing the theory of evolution; Muhammed, for being a murderous, mangy sand-flea; or the guy who invented the DVD player. You wouldn't believe what it's cost me to make the transition from VHS tapes to discs.
If there was one mammalian species you had to choose, right now, to become extinct, which would it be?
Another toss-up: Either the leftist moonbat, or the polecat (that's Southron for skunk).
Assuming God exists, and he handed you a button that, if pushed, would destroy Him, Jesus, the Kingdom of Heaven, and the entire Heavenly Host, would you push it, and why? Or why not?
And extinguish the only light in this dark universe? Are you kidding?
Assuming the universe still exists after that last question, if God handed you a button that, if pushed, would erase humanity from existence, would you push it, and why? Or why not?
If I really had this option, I might give it a few moments of sincere pondering. Aren't y'all delighted that I'm not God? I wouldn't do it because--for all their faults and evils--there are many good people who spread love and hope throughout the world. And for some reason, God chooses not to do just that. Who am I to question His wisdom? Now, if you limited this to certain sections of the population, I might consider it further. Again, aren't y'all thrilled that I'm not the Creator?
Assuming humanity still exists, after that last question, if God handed you a button that would erase one race from existence, would you push it, who would you choose, and why?
Get behind me, Satan! You sorely tempt me. The Arab race has vexed the last 1,400 years of history, so I'd likely go with them, if I pushed the button. But I don't see the world through racial lenses, and even the Arabs deserve the chance to seek Christ's redemption. No human being should have such arbitrary power.
Aside from all the other questions, and apart (and I wish you would consider each one of them separately) if you could go back in your own timeline, anywhere, and change any one event, knowing that your present would utterly disappear, altered forever......would you? And, if yes, which one.
Nope. There's too much about my present life that I love, too many people who have entered it, only to brighten the drab curtains and splash rainbow colors on the walls. No change in my past is worth the loss of even one of these cherished ones.
Sunday, October 23, 2005
"Coming Out" for Your Children
A Maryland high school is observing "National Coming Out Week" with events organized by the campus Gay/Straight Alliance, prompting protests from parents.
The observance, which began Monday, encourages homosexuals to admit their sexual preference to others and encourages heterosexuals to show support.
If the other 1, 999, 567, 763 reasons to keep your kids out of the public indoctrination centers didn't convince you, well, here's reason # 1, 999, 567, 764.
The observance, which began Monday, encourages homosexuals to admit their sexual preference to others and encourages heterosexuals to show support.
If the other 1, 999, 567, 763 reasons to keep your kids out of the public indoctrination centers didn't convince you, well, here's reason # 1, 999, 567, 764.
Bye-Bye Birdy
The U.N. calls for bold moves in restraining lethal bird flu:
EVERY country, including Britain, should appoint a Cabinet-level minister within the next two months to co-ordinate their response to avian flu, the United Nations’ most senior bird flu expert said yesterday.
So, just as communist countries need the services of a Minister of Propaganda, and Islamic countries value ministers of Chaos and Destruction and ministers of Self-Immolation, the whole world now suffers from a dearth of Flu ministers.
With a name like "Flu Minister," I almost expect a person who hands out little vials of Bottled Death standing at the head of a long line, proffering his wares to the citizens with a smile and a wink and a pat on the back before sending them off to the thanatoriums.
EVERY country, including Britain, should appoint a Cabinet-level minister within the next two months to co-ordinate their response to avian flu, the United Nations’ most senior bird flu expert said yesterday.
So, just as communist countries need the services of a Minister of Propaganda, and Islamic countries value ministers of Chaos and Destruction and ministers of Self-Immolation, the whole world now suffers from a dearth of Flu ministers.
With a name like "Flu Minister," I almost expect a person who hands out little vials of Bottled Death standing at the head of a long line, proffering his wares to the citizens with a smile and a wink and a pat on the back before sending them off to the thanatoriums.
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Dubya's Backup
In the event that Harriet Miers' nomination falls flatter than a drunken wookie, Dubya has chosen a second pick for the position.He even comes with his own black robe.
Friday, October 21, 2005
Take-Your-Raghead-to-School Day
A public skewel dabbles in Islamic brainwashing:
The Thomas More Law Center says that for three weeks, "impressionable 12-year-old students" were, among other things, placed into Islamic city groups; took Islamic names; wore identification tags that displayed their new Islamic name and the star and crescent moon; handed materials that instructed them to 'Remember Allah always so that you may prosper'; completed the Islamic Five Pillars of Faith, including fasting; and memorized and recited the 'Bismillah' or 'In the name of God, the Merciful, the Compassionate,' which students also wrote on banners hung on the classroom walls.
Students also played "jihad games" during the course, which was part of the school's world history and geography program.
If this isn't a brazen attempt at indoctrination, then what the heck is it?
In her 22-page ruling, U.S. District Judge Phyllis Hamilton determined Excelsior was not indoctrinating students about Islam when it required them to adopt Muslim names and pray to Allah, but rather was just teaching them about the Muslim religion.
The lawsuit also alleges students were encouraged to use such phrases in their speech as "Allah Akbar," which is Arabic for "God is great," and were required to fast during lunch period to simulate fasting during the Islamic holy month of Ramadan.
Nevertheless, Judge Hamilton ruled the program was devoid of "any devotional or religious intent" and was, therefore, educational, not religious in nature.
Hm, I wonder how much they were taught about the bloody, ruthless aspects of the "Religion of Peace?" I wonder if there was any mention of Muhammed's pedophile tendencies, or his beheading of over 300 Jews in a single day? I imagine they learned all about the Muslim definition of tolerance: "Submit, convert, or die." When a story has two clear sides, and one is presented while the other is ignored, this does not fit the meaning of the word "education." Let's call it what it is: programming.
Not only is the judge a dishonest moron, but the irony of the situation isn't lost on me: let's present a deceitful, rosy portrait of a religion whose practitioners would gleefully kill us all--if given half the chance--and wipe our civilization from the face of the Earth. That includes the skewel's administrators, and the multicultist judge who presided over the case.
The Thomas More Law Center says that for three weeks, "impressionable 12-year-old students" were, among other things, placed into Islamic city groups; took Islamic names; wore identification tags that displayed their new Islamic name and the star and crescent moon; handed materials that instructed them to 'Remember Allah always so that you may prosper'; completed the Islamic Five Pillars of Faith, including fasting; and memorized and recited the 'Bismillah' or 'In the name of God, the Merciful, the Compassionate,' which students also wrote on banners hung on the classroom walls.
Students also played "jihad games" during the course, which was part of the school's world history and geography program.
If this isn't a brazen attempt at indoctrination, then what the heck is it?
In her 22-page ruling, U.S. District Judge Phyllis Hamilton determined Excelsior was not indoctrinating students about Islam when it required them to adopt Muslim names and pray to Allah, but rather was just teaching them about the Muslim religion.
The lawsuit also alleges students were encouraged to use such phrases in their speech as "Allah Akbar," which is Arabic for "God is great," and were required to fast during lunch period to simulate fasting during the Islamic holy month of Ramadan.
Nevertheless, Judge Hamilton ruled the program was devoid of "any devotional or religious intent" and was, therefore, educational, not religious in nature.
Hm, I wonder how much they were taught about the bloody, ruthless aspects of the "Religion of Peace?" I wonder if there was any mention of Muhammed's pedophile tendencies, or his beheading of over 300 Jews in a single day? I imagine they learned all about the Muslim definition of tolerance: "Submit, convert, or die." When a story has two clear sides, and one is presented while the other is ignored, this does not fit the meaning of the word "education." Let's call it what it is: programming.
Not only is the judge a dishonest moron, but the irony of the situation isn't lost on me: let's present a deceitful, rosy portrait of a religion whose practitioners would gleefully kill us all--if given half the chance--and wipe our civilization from the face of the Earth. That includes the skewel's administrators, and the multicultist judge who presided over the case.
Thursday, October 20, 2005
"Subversive and Dangerous"
A Bible printing press was confiscated in Cuba:
After calling for reinforcements, a truck arrived with 12 armed, uniformed police who seized the gospels and the printing press. Cuban officials called the materials "subversive and dangerous."
The Ministry of Religion called the confiscated printing press "very dangerous."
A Cuban "Ministry of Religion," run by an atheist? Now I've heard everything. It's kinda like the Clinton administration setting up a "Ministry of Ethics." Please. Pure oxymoronics.
As for the Gospels being dangerous writings, you'd better believe it. Nothing ticks off el jefe like a book insisting that he's full of el crappo.
Elsewhere in Cuba, threats of demolition of house churches have never been so high. Recently, the government outlawed them and plans to hunt them down and close them. Many house churches have had equipment such as pews, homemade benches, musical instruments, Christian literature and anything else confiscated by police.
Remember this the next time some soulless Hollywhacked vice merchant ( like Oliver Stoned, for example) grovels on his face before Castro, and comes back to capitalist hell with his eyes shining with joy at the unbridled bliss found only in the People's Paradise of Kooba.
After calling for reinforcements, a truck arrived with 12 armed, uniformed police who seized the gospels and the printing press. Cuban officials called the materials "subversive and dangerous."
The Ministry of Religion called the confiscated printing press "very dangerous."
A Cuban "Ministry of Religion," run by an atheist? Now I've heard everything. It's kinda like the Clinton administration setting up a "Ministry of Ethics." Please. Pure oxymoronics.
As for the Gospels being dangerous writings, you'd better believe it. Nothing ticks off el jefe like a book insisting that he's full of el crappo.
Elsewhere in Cuba, threats of demolition of house churches have never been so high. Recently, the government outlawed them and plans to hunt them down and close them. Many house churches have had equipment such as pews, homemade benches, musical instruments, Christian literature and anything else confiscated by police.
Remember this the next time some soulless Hollywhacked vice merchant ( like Oliver Stoned, for example) grovels on his face before Castro, and comes back to capitalist hell with his eyes shining with joy at the unbridled bliss found only in the People's Paradise of Kooba.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
"Just Trust Me"
I'm constantly reading criticisms of the Miers nomination on the grounds that she is not--and has not been--a constitutional attorney or a judge. Since the Constitution does not require the holding of these positions as qualifications for a Supreme Court justice, I don't find these arguments very compelling. Since judges predictably prove themselves constitutional babes in the woods--or worse, brazen enemies of the document--with regularity, I'm not particularly impressed by such a resume. I'd much prefer a sanitation engineer with a firm grasp of constitutional principles over a judge with 30 years experience legislating from the bench, any day of the week.
To me, a far more important criterion is: Has the candidate provided demonstrations of understanding the Constitution? In this regard, we have nothing but a large question mark for an answer. What information I've gleaned from news articles either has been inconclusive, or contradictory of other stories.
Even more problematic is the sad truth that--try as I might--I can find no reason for her nomination, beyond the fact that she's a personal friend of the president, and that she is of the female persuasion. I don't think I'm clutching at the stars, when I establish a more rigorous set of expectations than "Wayul, I like 'er, an' she's got lotsa estrogen."
To me, a far more important criterion is: Has the candidate provided demonstrations of understanding the Constitution? In this regard, we have nothing but a large question mark for an answer. What information I've gleaned from news articles either has been inconclusive, or contradictory of other stories.
Even more problematic is the sad truth that--try as I might--I can find no reason for her nomination, beyond the fact that she's a personal friend of the president, and that she is of the female persuasion. I don't think I'm clutching at the stars, when I establish a more rigorous set of expectations than "Wayul, I like 'er, an' she's got lotsa estrogen."
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
At Least He Tried
Red Kennedy tries but fails in a water rescue attempt:
Well, that's not entirely accurate. The real rescuers used him as a flotation device, so he did make a contribution.
Well, that's not entirely accurate. The real rescuers used him as a flotation device, so he did make a contribution.
Monday, October 17, 2005
50 Million on the Richter Scale
Western governments rushed to step up their pledges for the earthquake relief effort after their initial response to the disaster was condemned as slow-moving and financially inadequate.
The United States, which was under pressure to increase a pledge of $500,000 (£280,000) considered almost derisory by many Pakistanis when it was made over the weekend, announced it intended to give $50m in emergency aid.
Imagine this in the context of the Good Samaritan parable: A man is robbed, beaten, and left for dead by the roadside. After being passed and ignored by several people, a Samaritan man comes along and finds him. The traveler feels compassion for the victim--caring for his wounds, giving him water, and taking him to a place where he'll receive further aid. He even pays for the stranger's treatment and lodging.
As the Samaritan is about to leave the injured man in the hands of those who will nurse him back to health, the fellow struggles up in bed, coughing and barely supporting himself on one bruised and torn elbow, and screeches:
"Where in the heck were you, six hours ago, when I first got my butt kicked? Thanks for nothing!"
I'm sure at this point, the Samaritan wishes he'd left the man in the ditch, and perhaps given him a good swift kick as he lay there, before offering him the dust of his heels as balm for his sorry state.
The United States, which was under pressure to increase a pledge of $500,000 (£280,000) considered almost derisory by many Pakistanis when it was made over the weekend, announced it intended to give $50m in emergency aid.
Imagine this in the context of the Good Samaritan parable: A man is robbed, beaten, and left for dead by the roadside. After being passed and ignored by several people, a Samaritan man comes along and finds him. The traveler feels compassion for the victim--caring for his wounds, giving him water, and taking him to a place where he'll receive further aid. He even pays for the stranger's treatment and lodging.
As the Samaritan is about to leave the injured man in the hands of those who will nurse him back to health, the fellow struggles up in bed, coughing and barely supporting himself on one bruised and torn elbow, and screeches:
"Where in the heck were you, six hours ago, when I first got my butt kicked? Thanks for nothing!"
I'm sure at this point, the Samaritan wishes he'd left the man in the ditch, and perhaps given him a good swift kick as he lay there, before offering him the dust of his heels as balm for his sorry state.
Nazis in the Heartland
"Whew! I just finished a long day at the rally with the guys, and boy, are my arms tired!"
Sunday, October 16, 2005
The Long Kiss Good Night
New face on dollar bill: Geena Davis
When first I saw this headline on World Net Daily, I shuddered and nearly swooned, wondering if the world as we know it truly had come to an end. Sure, she was ok in Beetlejuice, but would she make a good commandette-in-chief?
Then I realized it was just part of a tv show.
Still, after the last thirteen years, it makes me wonder.
When first I saw this headline on World Net Daily, I shuddered and nearly swooned, wondering if the world as we know it truly had come to an end. Sure, she was ok in Beetlejuice, but would she make a good commandette-in-chief?
Then I realized it was just part of a tv show.
Still, after the last thirteen years, it makes me wonder.
Friday, October 14, 2005
Funny Pictures
I hope you get a laugh out of these. I know I did:
Rainbow's End
Upgrade
Taken for a Ride
Bike Trip
Lock 'n Load
Rainbow's End
Upgrade
Taken for a Ride
Bike Trip
Lock 'n Load
Thursday, October 13, 2005
The Grave of the Future
Grand opening: Swiss euthanasia clinic in Britain
I can almost hear the radio ads:
Tired of that old curmudgeon uncle?
Sick of Granny's dementia?
Disgusted with the last election's results?
Fed-up with Wallace and Gromit reruns?
Well, come on down, and let Dignitas dispose of your unwanted corpus!
Dignitas--where life is but a dream!
I can almost hear the radio ads:
Tired of that old curmudgeon uncle?
Sick of Granny's dementia?
Disgusted with the last election's results?
Fed-up with Wallace and Gromit reruns?
Well, come on down, and let Dignitas dispose of your unwanted corpus!
Dignitas--where life is but a dream!
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Illegal Update
As I was sifting through WorldNetDaily and munching on my Border-Jumper combo from Taco Bell, I came across several interesting news items:
Arnold Schwarzeneggar vetoes bill providing driver's licenses to illegals.
When asked for a comment, the Governor said: "I tuhminated it with my pen. But don't worry; it'll be bahck."
Sign posted by U-Haul: "Please do not hire illegal laborers. We have had numerous reports of injuries, thefts and damages to personal belongings. It is a federal crime to employ or pick up illegal day laborers, punishable by a $5,000 fine."
Idiot response quote: "The tack they're taking is a particularly troubling one," Wilson said. "They're painting illegal day workers as criminals, making generalizations about a group of people."
Illegals? Criminals? Perish the thought. God bless U-Haul.
Sheriff gets armored car for patrolling the border:
The $18,000, nine-ton, six-wheeled vehicle is needed because of increased attacks against deputies and U.S. Border Patrol agents by drug and migrant smugglers, sheriff's and patrol officials said. The agencies frequently work together.
Law enforcement officers in the border region are increasingly subject to rock throwing, gunfire and being rammed by fleeing vehicles.
That's really unfair. All these "undocumented workers" just want employment, such as picking apples and pockets, and dealing used cars and drugs. We need them, after all! Americans are the stupidest, laziest people on the face of the earth! Just ask anyone from La Raza. They'll set ya straight.
A south Georgia mayor said Friday he will continue flying a Mexican flag at city hall for the six immigrant farmworkers slain in robberies - despite complaints from residents.
When questioned about his methods, he said: "Well, I could only think of one way to honor these decent people: insult my fellow countrymen. Seemed like a good plan at the time, and it still does."
Many of those engaged in the huge cleanup and reconstruction effort here (Nawleuhns)-- nobody has an exact count -- are immigrants, both legal and illegal, from Mexico and Central America.
Meanwhile, as many as 80,000 New Orleanians sit idle in shelters around the country. They are out of work, homeless and destitute.
Mayor Ray Nagin added his voice to the chorus this week, telling local business people: "How do I ensure that New Orleans is not overrun by Mexican workers?"
I ain't sure, Ray. But I guar-own-tee that this inundation is all Bush's fault--jest like global warming.
Arnold Schwarzeneggar vetoes bill providing driver's licenses to illegals.
When asked for a comment, the Governor said: "I tuhminated it with my pen. But don't worry; it'll be bahck."
Sign posted by U-Haul: "Please do not hire illegal laborers. We have had numerous reports of injuries, thefts and damages to personal belongings. It is a federal crime to employ or pick up illegal day laborers, punishable by a $5,000 fine."
Idiot response quote: "The tack they're taking is a particularly troubling one," Wilson said. "They're painting illegal day workers as criminals, making generalizations about a group of people."
Illegals? Criminals? Perish the thought. God bless U-Haul.
Sheriff gets armored car for patrolling the border:
The $18,000, nine-ton, six-wheeled vehicle is needed because of increased attacks against deputies and U.S. Border Patrol agents by drug and migrant smugglers, sheriff's and patrol officials said. The agencies frequently work together.
Law enforcement officers in the border region are increasingly subject to rock throwing, gunfire and being rammed by fleeing vehicles.
That's really unfair. All these "undocumented workers" just want employment, such as picking apples and pockets, and dealing used cars and drugs. We need them, after all! Americans are the stupidest, laziest people on the face of the earth! Just ask anyone from La Raza. They'll set ya straight.
A south Georgia mayor said Friday he will continue flying a Mexican flag at city hall for the six immigrant farmworkers slain in robberies - despite complaints from residents.
When questioned about his methods, he said: "Well, I could only think of one way to honor these decent people: insult my fellow countrymen. Seemed like a good plan at the time, and it still does."
Many of those engaged in the huge cleanup and reconstruction effort here (Nawleuhns)-- nobody has an exact count -- are immigrants, both legal and illegal, from Mexico and Central America.
Meanwhile, as many as 80,000 New Orleanians sit idle in shelters around the country. They are out of work, homeless and destitute.
Mayor Ray Nagin added his voice to the chorus this week, telling local business people: "How do I ensure that New Orleans is not overrun by Mexican workers?"
I ain't sure, Ray. But I guar-own-tee that this inundation is all Bush's fault--jest like global warming.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Blogging Techniques
Gee, Wes, could you possibly be more wild-eyed and spraying spittle all over the monitor? You musta been talking to Nate. Remember, the proper pose when typing something of this sort is to hunch over the keyboard, elbows akimbo, pounding furiously while glancing around furtively.
In what I can only describe as superior remote viewing capabilities, Bill has characterized my blogging posture to a tee. I would only add that I wear a bib to minimize drool spillage, and I have a slight tic in my right eye. Often, I'll titter in a high voice like a witch at a black mass, for no discernible reason. Well, that's not quite true. It always elicits a look of quiet unease from the Man in Black crouching in the corner.
Now if y'all will excuse me, I have some furious pounding to catch up on.
In what I can only describe as superior remote viewing capabilities, Bill has characterized my blogging posture to a tee. I would only add that I wear a bib to minimize drool spillage, and I have a slight tic in my right eye. Often, I'll titter in a high voice like a witch at a black mass, for no discernible reason. Well, that's not quite true. It always elicits a look of quiet unease from the Man in Black crouching in the corner.
Now if y'all will excuse me, I have some furious pounding to catch up on.
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