Thursday, February 18, 2010

Nothing Says "Hate" Like a Gift Bible

An eighth-grade teacher has accused her students of committing a "hate crime" and being "cruel" because they left a Bible on her desk and a Christmas card with the word "Christ" underlined.

Melissa Hussain, an Apex, N.C., science teacher at West Lake Middle School, is suspended with pay and may lose her job after she purportedly clashed with students on the subject of religion and sent students to the school office when they asked about the role of God in creation during a lesson about evolution.

Hussain wrote on her then-public Facebook page that it was a "hate crime" when her students left a Bible on her desk, according to the Charlotte News & Observer. She complained about students singing "Jesus Loves Me" and wearing Jesus T shirts.

Hussain said she "was able to shame her kids" over the incidents.

"I can't believe the cruelty and ignorance of people sometimes," Hussain wrote on the social networking site.

She said she wouldn't let the Bible incident "go unpunished."

I don't know if this is an example of a Muslim gaming the system that tolerates her intolerance, or one of extreme leftism in action; either way, she's of a totalitarian mentality. She also has a dearth of common sense: how is giving someone a Bible a hate - crime? How is leaving someone a Christmas card with the word "Christ" underlined a demonstration of hate? How is sending students to the principal's office for asking about God's role in the creation process not an exercise in hate or bigotry? It's patently not illustrative of love or broad - mindedness.

As for songs like "Jesus Loves Me," and "Jesus" T - shirts, well, I'm astounded by the fortitude she's displayed in lasting this long under such oppression. I'm sure the inmates at Bergen - Belsen would've sympathized. Now she knows how Solzhenitsyn felt.

I wonder if efforts at placing a Koran on her desk, professions of the shahada, or T - shirts proclaiming "There's nothing wrong with infidels that a scimitar can't fix" would have made her swoon in righteous outrage?

The bottom line is that those on the Left -- and their Muslim fellow travellers -- harbor the shared goal of crushing religious liberty, freedom of expression, and all dissent. The sooner Americans wake up to this reality, the sooner they can address it and take action, before it's too late.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Mental Effluvia

Tip for young women: When it's thirty - five degrees outside, a sweatshirt and shorts probably isn't the best shopping ensemble at your local supercenter. And I'm not talking regular short pants, here; I mean hot pink ones that ensure a glimpse of the promised land if Buffy ever takes a notion to bend over.


Darwiniacs have taught us that the peer review process is eminently scientific. Intelligent Design is not allowed in peer reviewed publications, due to its unscientific nature. And the reason we know that ID is unscientific is because it is barred from peer - reviewed journals.


If the Morbid Professor had taken a ride on Ol' Sparky's lap back in 1986 for her brother's murder, we wouldn't be talking about three dead people at the University of Alabama, today.


Until the advent of Twilight, I had no idea that vampires were so sexy, or that they shimmer with an angelic aura like Barack Obama when sunlight caresses their skin. I look forward to the next installment in the series, Confessions of a Necrophiliac.


To Chris Matthews: When you're feeling down in the dumps from all that manure - slinging you do for the Left, just remember that tingly feeling you get every time Obama winks at you. It might help you forget for a while that he's a socialist. Watch out for his wife, though; I'm sure she's less than ecstatic that her hubby gets you more aroused than Algore at Copenhagen. Remember some of the smouldering glares she gave Oprah while she fawned all over him? Let's put it this way: if looks could kill, the talk - show queen / New Age guru / weight - loss maven would have been a congealing, mewling puddle on the floor.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Elementary Anthem

His eye is on the sparrow
And peering right at you.
He bugs your phones and bedrooms
And watches all you do.

He never will forsake you
No matter where you go.
He notes your every action.
Just call him your Big Bro.

Fall to your knees and prostrate.
Cast on him all your cares.
Our Serengeti Savior
Hears our meanest prayers.

Friday, February 5, 2010

A D.C. Airline Ticket Agent Talks

I received this in an email:

A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)

2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman's (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, ''I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts .''

Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ''Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Cape Town is in Africa ''

His response -- click.

3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.

He replied, “Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!''

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ''Is it possible to see England from Canada?''

I said, ''No.''

She said, ''But they look so close on the map.''

5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ''I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.''

6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.

I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ''Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?''

I said, 'No, why do you ask?'

He replied, ''Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!''

After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is FAT (Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.

8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, ''Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?''

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright (D) from Alabama who asked, ''How do I know which plane to get on?''

I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ''I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.''

10. Senator Dianne Feinstein (D) called and said, ''I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?''

I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane.

She said, ''Yeah, whatever, smarty!''

11. Mary Landrieu (D) La. Senator called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. “Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.''

I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, ''Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!''

12. A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ''I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York.''

I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ''Are you sure that's the name of the town?''

"Yes, what flights do you have?'' replied the man.

After some searching, I came back with, ''I'm sorry, sir, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere."

''The man retorted, ''Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!''

So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ''You don't mean Buffalo, do you?''

The reply? ''Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.''

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Random Observations

I'm all for cutting government spending of taxpayer dollars, but Ocondom's proposed elimination of funding abstinence - only education is a decision originating in ideology, not frugality. We know this because abortion activists like Otrojan advicate the opposite of self control; after all, a woman cannot exercise her right to terminate her offspring without first engaging in the horizontal mambo. More murdered babies equals more victories for Obortion and his evil minions. Since keeping it zipped tends toward decreasing venereal diseases, unwanted pregnancies, and children sacrificed to the god of Self, leftist ideologues like Orubber find the policy distasteful.


I'm sure there's a perfectly plausible explanation for why Okenya's legal team has spent somewhere in the neighborhood of 1.7 million dollars keeping his long - form birth certificate locked away from the prying eyes of U.S. citizens. I rest assured in the knowledge that we'll discover the answer sometime after the final trump sounds.


I've searched my copy of the U.S. Constitution in vain for that Article or Section or Clause that bestows Ohaiti with the privilege of sending money confiscated from Americans under the threat of violence to tenth - world countries that fall victim to natural disasters. Stolen money used for charitable purposes still is just that. Stolen. And is it an act of charity, indeed, when the money sent belongs to someone other than the sender, and was taken without that person's consent? Not where I come from.


Telling a teenager, "Don't have sex, but if you must have sex, wear a condom," is like telling a criminal, "Don't rob liquor stores, but if you must rob liquor stores, wear a ski mask."


If you believe in spending our way out of economic dissolution, you probably also believe that the best way out of debt is by applying for a new credit card.